Heart to Heart

I thought that I was prepared for my mom to die…she had fallen and broken her hip, had a stroke after the surgery to repair the fracture, went to rehab and worked her way back to her assisted living facility but was never the same.  Her health declined steadily and then she just became too sick to go on.  I thought I was ready for her to die.

Do you feel mad about your grief? I’ve felt so mad. Mad that I’m in this space. That I’m navigating a “new normal” that I didn’t ask for. Angry that my person is gone, my world crumbled. I don’t always feel safe, I feel exposed and raw.
I hate the way they died, I hate how I found out, I hate the lack of goodbye in my story.

I feel lonely. Like no one can actually understand the enormity of my grief.

My name is John and I wanted to pass along some thoughts that I have had regarding starting a new year with grief. I have read a number of books on grief and several grief programs. All of these have been helpful in dealing with the grief I am experiencing. And I plan on becoming part of more face-to-face groups dealing with the emotions that surround the loss of a loved one. And, as you know, these emotions are many and varied, from anger to depression to sadness to disbelief to grief, etc.,